Do mindful words make you uncomfortable? When you hear the word mindfulness, do you roll your eyes? Does mindful flow come across as 'woo-woo' or a little out there?

 I was once like this. I just didn't 'get' it. The concept of mindfulness was so foreign to me. Honestly, I found it a bit hippie, granola, if you know what I mean.

When you have not been brought up in a mindful household, or you were not exposed to this language in your youth, it can bring uncomfortable feelings to the surface. It may make you physically step back. Are you thinking already "this 'stuff' is not for me? Is it too touchy-feely? Have some faith, read on my friend, read on.

 Think of trying mindfulness like trying a new experience for the first time. Let's use the example of learning to swim. You may think to yourself. I am unsure of the water, and I am pretty confident that I will hate learning to swim. I am pretty sure that is how I felt about swimming when I was first at the swimming pool as a toddler. I have heard stories of my being a bawler when it came to new experiences. It turned out I do like to swim. I learned this after I tried it.

We get set in our ways reasonably early on in life, and it can be hard to branch out into new areas or to expand our thinking to include new experiences. How do you know if you do not like something if you do not ever try it or try to understand it?

I think new experiences can be like visiting a new culture for the first time. You are overwhelmed, out of place, and do not understand the language being spoken. Mindfulness has a style too. Have you heard the terms spoken? Do you know them?

Want to meet and understand mindfulness?

Maybe you need to see the face of mindfulness, recognize it as different, and then decide if you want to be a friend to mindfulness. Ask mindfulness in for a glass of wine. You know, that type of thing. 

This is the getting to know you phase. Will you be for me? Maybe I will find another path that veers away from mindfulness? No problem. How about gaining some understanding before you say no to this potential friendship?

That is what I tried to do. Start with a dip of a toe in the pool. Learn to swim.

Here are a few terms to help you get to know mindfulness. 

• Flow Dictionary •

1. HOLD SPACE

To sit in another person's presencewithout judgment. This is a practice of empathy, compassion, and acceptance. The key is to do these things for another person without wanting anything in return.

2. AUTHENTIC SELF

The authentic self means embracing the real you. This is not intended to be the person you believe you SHOULD be. There is a big difference. The authentic self is accepting of all your imperfections and positive traits, and the opposite is critical and self-defeating.

3. MEDITATION

Meditation is reflection, contemplation, engagement in relaxing thought. This is the act of paying attention to moment-to-moment experiences. It can include tasks you enjoy that allow time to pass with only the immersion in the activity or stillness.

4. GRATITUDE

Gratitude is the quality or feeling of being grateful or thankful.

5. CENTERED

The centering technique helps identify the reaction a person has to events that are perceived as threatening or stress-inducing.

Instead of embracing a profoundly ingrained, hormone-induced stress response, centering shows how to calm and slow your mind and your breathing. Calming and centering your mind and emotions to a point where you can 'feel' instead of reacting. This is a process that is very useful in defusing or de-escalating conflicts.

6. ACCEPTANCE

The action or process of being received as adequate or suitable. This can be relating to self-perception and acceptance of character, or it can relate to feeling about other people.

7. BREATHE

The practice of sharpening focus and attention on your breath as a way to combat stress, anxiety, and negative emotions, For example, use it to calm anger.

8. COMPASSION

Self-compassion is the encouragement of greater kindness and understanding of our personal flaws during periods of suffering.

"Compassion is not a relationship between the healer and the wounded. It's a relationship between equals. Only when we know our own darkness well can we be present with the darkness of others. Compassion becomes real when we recognize our shared humanity."

―Pema Chödrön, The Places That Scare You: A Guide to Fearlessness in Difficult Times

9. CREATIVE

A combination of freedom and constraint, the creative process is a way to focus attention, nurturing divergent thinking to harness creative insight. The result is the originality of thought, expression, and imagination.

10. CALM

Freedom from motion or disturbance. A sense of stillness of movement and comfortable, deep breathing.

11. YOUR TRUTH

Asking yourself this question, "Is this something I really want?" The way to your truth is this: Pause when feeling overwhelmed and too busy. Take a deep breathe and ask yourself… Is this the life I want? Or Is this what is expected of me? Live your truth.

12. FLOW

A release of the thought patterns of an individual. A letting go of worry, allowing complete focus on the task at hand. The job gives a great sense of personal satisfaction.

13. SERENITY

The state of being calm, peaceful, and untroubled.

14. REFLECTION

The act of serious thought or consideration about our past, present and future while recognizing thoughts, positive, negative and neutral are only thoughts. They come and go. It is unnecessary to react to them in emotional engagement.

15. PLAY

Engagement in activity for enjoyment and recreation rather than a serious or a practical purpose.

16. LET GO

Relinquish one's grip on constraints or negative emotions.

17. SELF CARE

The practice of taking an active role in protecting one's well-being and happiness, in particular during periods of stress.

18. MINDFUL

Attentive, aware, and observant of one's experiences. The ability to connect with what you are doing at the moment while disengaging entirely from past and future. Mindfulness is accepting and non-judgmentally observing of your self and others.

19. JOY

A feeling of great pleasure and happiness

20. CREATIVE JOY

A sense of great pleasure and satisfaction brought on by the act of creating in a mindful, calm, accepting, and non-judgemental state.

I hope these words help you understand the language of mindful.

Enjoy the rest of your day.